2004-02-13 - 2:25 p.m.
in light of the recent furor over same-sex marriage rights, i wanted to share what i watched on tv last night. i'd seen it before, but in light of the debate going on, it's pretty timely.
america undercover on hbo had a documentary on entitled: "southern comfort". it's an absolutely gripping documentary about a female to male transsexual (robert eads) who has only had the operation on his top half. he kept his female genitalia, because for him it was a nonissue. robert said himself that he didn't need something swinging between his legs to make him feel like a man, because he'd known he was a man since he was born and forced to grow up playing with dollies and wearing pretty dresses. the fact that robert didn't have a penis wasn't the issue. the issue was that robert who had been living as a man for years up to this point had been diagnosed with ovarian cancer and was dying. here's the clincher: NO DOCTOR WOULD TREAT HIM FOR THE CANCER BECAUSE HE WAS A TRANSSEXUAL! one doctor told him point blank, "having you sitting in my office for treatment would EMBARRASS my other patients..."
what the fuck? where are the ethics? this man suffered until he died because no one would help him. he chose to live his life as who he believed he truly was, in his words "in his heart and his mind". for that he was punished with a painful death, no help, no support, no medication, no surgery, no chemo, no lifesaving measures. all he had was the support of his partner lola cola (a male to female transsexual) and his friends in the community (by community i mean either enlightened family members or other transsexuals).
the documentary follows robert through a year of his life, and we watch him slowly deteriorate. it is heartwrenching and i think absolutely essential for people to watch. if it's "on demand," you need to see it.
i felt compelled to watch the entire thing last night, although i was tired, because i felt i owed it him (although i didn't know him) to watch it. it's a disturbing, and again timely thought, that human beings are punished for just being themselves. not allowing a dying man cancer treatment, because your definition of man is different than his is just as bad as this country (or state, or whatever) not allowing two men or two women to marry because your definition of marriage doesn't include them. both behaviors (by these so-called doctors and politicians) are reprehensible and i am disgusted.
